Chapter B: Did the baby Poop?

Oct 7, 2020
Dear Diary,

You know you are so lucky. Nobody pesters you to poop or pee at their convenience. You find the topic gross? Then just imagine my plight when I am badgered every now and then about this thing.
Just today as I was sipping into my happy phase after my favourite bath session, the same question attacked me for the hundredth time and spoiled my mood.

When are you going to do potty?

Okay, so I have not pooped for more than twenty-four hours. Big deal. Am I not making this woman change my wet nappy every half an hour? But, no, the greedy woman is never happy. She keeps on discussing when am I going to poop, what is the reason behind not pooping. Sometimes I feel she is obsessed with those green and yellow things. Weird fetish these adults nourish, I must say.

And just when I was settling down with her uncomfortable query, came the other culprit.
“So, did he poop?” the man asked the bewildered woman.

The once bearded man has all of a sudden gone clean shave for reason unknown to me and I almost could not recognise him at first. But, the other day when I was crying my heart out because I was too tired, sleeping on my back for a long time and this guy again fed me that icky medicine deducing, ‘the stomach must be hurting’, the disguise was over.

But, for the time being, even he was adding to my woes by repeating the same thing. I shouted in my language that “I will poop when I will poop” but this clueless couple was unable to decipher.
However, all isn’t lost. I had my time of glory several minutes later.

They put me on the bedsheet to change the oilcloth. The timing was perfect. Didn’t I already mention, I pooped when I poop. 😉

Soon the wail of the woman was heard.

“Oh no, he soiled the whole bed!”

Gosh, the woman was again complaining. Believe me diary, you can never please these grown-ups

—X—

This post is a part of the A2Z021 challenge by Blogchatter.

The blogs of A2Z2020 on my beloved city Kolkata is now available in book format. You may check it at Kolkata Chronicles: An A To Z Guide For The Uninitiated

 

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Comments

  1. Haha, I can relate to being that women completely. My son is 3 months old, and I am sure he must be thinking the same. What an hilarious take on ‘did the baby poop’. Loved reading it.

  2. This cute munchkin managed to keep a wide smile to my face throughout reading, even over pooping. I am dwelling in this phase I can relate it o well.

  3. I am amazed to see this interpretation from baby’s perspective. this poop story was super cute, will read this to my girls, I am sure they will love it.

  4. Haha he soiled the bedsheet after waiting so long for him to poop. Happens to the best of us. Love your style of writing you bring out the most stressful events in a pleasant manner.
    Deepika Sharma

  5. Hahahaha this reminded of my horror when the pediatrician had asked me what was the color of the poop… What was it’s consistency… How many times etc etc etc

  6. When is she going to poop? I also keep on asking the same question for my 20 month old and she gives me repulsive looks!! Just like Sampurno

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